雨中长亭

Desperate Housewives - Episode 01.02 - Ah, But Underneath

 

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Guest stars

"Mrs. Martha Huber" - Christine Estabrook
"Dr. Albert Goldfine" - Sam Lloyd
"Beefy Middle-Aged Woman" - Jan Hoag
"Preston Scavo" - Brent Kinsman
"Porter Scavo" - Shane Kinsman
"Parker Scavo" - Zane Huett
"Cop" - Timothy Brennen
"Veterinarian" - Adam Lieberman

Written by: Marc Cherry
Directed by: Larry Shaw

 

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Voice over, spoken by Mary Alice Young.

 

"An odd thing happens when we die. Our senses vanish. Taste, touch, smell, and sound become a distant memory. But our sight. Ah. Our sight expands. And we can suddenly see the world we left behind so clearly. Of course, most of what's visible to the dead can also be seen by the living. If they only take the time to look."

Pan over a cemetery, focusing in on Mary Alice Young's grave, which reads:

Mary Alice Young
11*18*65 - 9*26*04
Beloved Wife and Mother

 

---

Gabrielle is lying in water, with her eyes closed.

 

"Like my friend, Gabrielle. I should have seen how unhappy she was. But I didn't."

Flash to scenes of Gabrielle with Carlos giving her gifts as Mary Alice speaks.

 

"I only saw her clothes from Paris. And her platinum jewelry. And her brand-new diamond watch. Had I looked closer, I would have seen that Gabrielle was a drowning woman. Desperately in search of a life vest. Luckily for her,"

Gabrielle comes out of the water and we see she's sitting in a bathtub. Sharing it, in fact, with John, the gardener, who she leans forward to kiss.

 

"She found one. Of course, Gabrielle only saw her young gardener as a way to infuse her life with a little excitement. But now, she was about to discover just how exciting her life could be."

Carlos's car pulls into the driveway. John and Gabrielle kiss as they towel off. Carlos slams the car door. Gabrielle hears it and runs to the window to look. As Carlos gets out of the car and gets the mail from the mailbox, she grabs John and they rush downstairs, grabbing clothing off of the floor as they do so.

Carlos sees the gardening tools on the lawn and looks around as he walks up to the house. Gabrielle tells John to climb out the window and as he does so, she pushes him. He falls, leaving behind the towel he had wrapped around him.

Gabrielle grabs the towel he had left behind and quickly puts her hair up with it. Carlos walks inside.

 

Gabrielle: "Hi, honey, you're home early."
Carlos: "My meeting got cancelled." He glances over at her. "You just took a shower this morning."

Gabrielle notices John's jeans still lying on the couch. She saunters casually over to them and puts a pillow on top of them as she tells Carlos that she just finished a workout.

 

Carlos: "Where's John?"
Gabrielle: "John?"
Carlos: "Yeah, that's his truck out front."

 

"Gabrielle was panicked. She knew if her husband discovered her secret, she would feel the full force of his wrath."

Suddenly, from outside, John says, "Hey, Mr. Solis!"

Gabrielle and Carlos turn to the window and see John from the waist up, clothed, trimming the hedge. Carlos tells him to work on the ficus and John tells him that he will. Before turning away to continue trimming the hedge, he looks at Gabrielle with a slight smile.

 

"But she was quickly reminded that what Carlos couldn't see, couldn't hurt her."

From the outside, we see John standing on a ladder, trimming the hedges...naked from the waist down.

 

---

 

Credits

 

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The four women are at Susan's house.

 

"The peaceful facade of Wisteria Lane had recently been shattered. First by my suicide. And then by the discovery of a note among my belongings that suspected a suspicious reason for my desperate act. My friends gathered to discuss its implications."

Susan picks up the note from the kitchen table. "I think we should give it to Paul."
Gabrielle takes it from her. "He's still mourning, Susan. He'll probably freak out."
Susan: "It doesn't matter. She was his wife. He deserves to have all the facts."
Bree: "Well, we could do it gently. We could tell him about it over coffee and pastry."
Lynette: "That'll be fun. 'Paul, we have proof your wife killed herself over some deep, dark, secret. Another bear claw?'"
Gabrielle: "We could always call the police."
Lynette: "Maybe it's just some sort of sick joke."
Bree: "Well, if it was a joke, it was in very poor taste."
Susan: "No, this was serious. I know it was. We gotta find out what was going on."
Lynette: "Let's say we do. There's a chance we're not gonna like what we find."
Susan: Well, isn't it worse to be in the dark? Imagining she did all of these horrible things?
Bree: "It's the age-old question, isn't it? How much do we really want to know about our neighbors?"

 

---

At the Young's house, there's a giant hole in the middle of the pool.

 

"My friends were right to be concerned. They knew that every family h as its secrets. And as my son and husband could have told them, you need to think carefully before digging them. up."

Zack stands by the edge of the hole, looking into it, and then turns to look at the darkened house. Inside the house, the husband carries a large chest into a dimly lit room, where he sets it down on a table and rubs his hands on top of it.

 

---

The women come out of Susan's house.

 

"After talking for hours, my friends still hadn't agreed on what to do with the note. So, they decided to talk about it in the morning after a g good night's rest."

The women part ways.

 

"But no one could fall asleep that night."

Each woman is shown lying in bed, wide awake.

 

"They each kept thinking of my suicide. And how terribly alone I must have felt. You see, loneliness was something my friends understood all too well."

Bree gets out of bed and goes downstairs to where Rex is sleeping on the couch. When she reaches him, she coughs politely and he rolls over, telling her that he's up. She smiles and sits down on the edge of the pull out bed. "Good. I have a question for you." He rolls his eyes, then pulls off the covers to sit next to her. "Okay."

 

Bree: "Do you remember when you proposed?"
Rex: "For God's sake."
Bree: "We sat on Skyline Drive and drank a bottle of apple wine and when we finished it, you turned to me and you said, 'If you marry me, Bree Mason, I promise to love you for the rest of my life.' And even though I was engaged to Ty Grant, and even though my father didn't like you, I said yes."
Rex: "That was a long time ago."
Bree: "You are going to cancel the meeting with that divorce lawyer and we are going to find ourselves a marriage counselor."
Rex: "Bree!"
Bree: "You promised."

They look at each other.

 

He nods. "All right."
"Good. I'm gonna go, uh, make myself some warm milk." She gets up and walks to the kitchen, stopping halfway to turn around and look at him. "Would you like something to drink?" As he gets up from the bed, he mutters, "Anything but apple wine."

 

---

At Susan's house, she takes a glass and fills it with tap water. As she drinks, she looks out her front window.

 

"Susan awoke that night alone and parched. And as she gazed out her window, she saw the tall drink of water she needed to quench her thirst."

Outside, Mike Delfino is walking slowly down the sidewalk with his dog.

Susan sighs.

 

Julie: "Dear Diary. Mike doesn't even know I'm alive."
Susan: "Shut up."
Julie: "If you want to date him, you're gonna have to ask him out.'
Susan: "I keep hoping he'll ask me out."
Julie: "How's that going?"
Susan: "Shouldn't you be making brownies for your nerdy friends?"
Julie: "I can't find the measuring cup. Have you seen it?"
Susan: "The measuring cup?" [she flashes back to when she dropped it on Edie's floor.]
Julie: "Yeah."
Susan: "Hmm." [flash back to Susan trying to put out Edie's fire with the jeans, and then running out of the house, past the measuring cup on the floor, then flashback to the fire engulfing Edie's house.] I, uh, well, it's gotta be here somewhere. Just keep looking."

 

---

Carlos walks into the bedroom, where Gabrielle is lying on the bed with her eyes closed. He walks into the closet and begins taking off his tie.

 

Carlos: "I know you're awake."
Gabrielle: "I know you're a jerk."
Carlos: "Dinner with Tanaka ran long. I'm sorry.
Gabrielle: "You know, Carlos, I didn't marry you so I could have dinner by myself 6 times a week. You know how bored I was today. I came this close to actually cleaning the house.
Carlos: "Don't be that way. I got you a gift."
Gabrielle: "Nope. No, no, no, no. You're not gonna buy your way out of this one.
Carlos: "It's a good gift." He tosses a red jewelry box in front of her.
She opens it. "Is that white gold?"
Carlos: "Yeah. Put it on." He kisses her shoulder. "And then make love to me."
Gabrielle: "I'm not in the mood. But, we could stay up and talk."

He laughs. "When a man buys a woman expensive jewelry, there are many things he may want in return. For future reference, conversation ain't one of them."

She throws the jewelry box at him, hitting him on the back. He turns around. "Hey, that was a joke."
She gets out of bed. "Yeah, right."

She starts to stalk past him, and he grabs her.

 

Carlos: "What the hell is wrong with you?"
Gabrielle: "Let go of me."
Carlos: "You've been acting like a nightmare for a month."
Gabrielle: "Stop!"
Carlos: "What's wrong?"
She keeps struggling and he holds on to her. "I can't fix it unless you tell me."
She breaks his hold and sits down. "It's not exciting anymore, Carlos."
Carlos: "So what am I supposed to do?"
Gabrielle: "I dunno. Be the way you used to be. Surprise me. take my breath away."
Carlos: "Okay."
She looks at him with her eyebrows raised and he reiterates: "Okay!"

 

---

The next morning, Susan, in a robe and slippers takes the garbage out to the curb, yawning. As she's bent over, pushing the garbage bag into the can, Mike, who's walking his dog nearby, looks over at her. "Hey, Susan." Susan hears him and freezes, still bent over.

 

Susan: "Mike!"
Mike: "What's wrong?"
Susan: "I didn't realize anybody was going to be out here. I just sort of rolled out of bed."
Mike: "I'm sure you look fine."

She moans quietly and quickly touches her face and hair before straightening up to look at him.

Bongo starts barking at her and Mike starts trying to calm him down. Julie, inside, hears the commotion and looks outside the window as she eats cereal.

 

Mike: "Sorry. He scares easy."
Susan: "No, it, it, it's fine. I get it."
Mike: "I didn't mean to disturb you. I'll see you later."

He starts to turn.

 

She steels herself and as he leaves, she bursts out, "Did you want to have dinner with me?"
He turns around. "Just the two of us?
Susan: "Well, and Julie. Uh, it's a thing we do when somebody new moves into the neighborhood, we invite them over for a home-cooked meal. It's sort of a tradition."
Mike: "I thought you said you were a lousy cook."
Susan: "Well, I order take-out."
Mike: "Oh. YOu invite them over for home-cooking and you give 'em takeout."
Susan: "Yeah, it's, it's, uh, it's sort of a new tradition. I'm working out the kinks."
He laughs. "I'll tell you what. How 'bout I cook. And you guys come over to my place?"
Susan: "Oh! Great."
Mike: "Friday night at six?"
Susan: "I'll be there."

He starts to go and Susan smiles, happy. She leans down to look at Bongo. "Bye, Bongo." He barks, scaring her. Julie watches, interested.

 

Susan runs into the house and calls for Julie. "Mike Delfino just invited us to dinner Friday night."
Julie: "He did? Cool!"
Susan: "But only I'm going. Because you're going to come down with something semi-serious that requires bed rest. And fluids."

She runs upstairs.

 

"Julie was glad Susan was rekindling her love life. Of course, she was unaware of her mother's recent track record with fire."

 

---

In Edie's burnt house, Edie and Mrs. Huber are going through the rubble.

 

Edie: "It's all gone. Everything my ex-husband worked for all those years. Gone."
Mrs. Huber:"Don't worry about clothing. I already started a collection from people from the neighborhood."
Edie: "What? I don't want to wear other people's old crap."
Mrs. Huber: "Edie, you can be homeless or you can be ungracious. You really can't afford to be both." She sighs. "That reminds me. My insurance check still hasn't come yet. Can I stay with you for a few more weeks?"
Edie: "Of course! What kind of Christian would I be if I denied shelter to a friend in need?" She spies the burnt measuring cup Susan had dropped on the floor. "Oh, look! Here's something we can salvage. your measuring cup. We can just scrape off the burnt part and it'll look good as new."
Edie: "that's not my cup. Mine was plastic."
Mrs: Huber: "Well, how did it get in here?"
Edie: "I dunno. Who cares?" She gets up and walks away. Mrs. Huber looks at the cup, interested.
Mrs. Huber: "Now, would you put that down and start looking for jewelry?"

Mrs. Huber stands up, but slowly rubs the measuring cup, as she thinks.

 

---

 

"Dr. Albert Goldfine was the most accomplished marriage counselor in the city. He had dealt with problems ranging from substance abuse, to infidelity, to domestic violence. Yes, Dr. Goldfine thought he had seen it all. And then, he met the Van De Kamps."

A knock on Dr. Goldfine's office door causes him to get up and answer it. Bree and Rex are standing there. Bree smiles and introduces herself and Rex to Dr. Goldfine.

 

Bree: "And I brought you some homemade potpourri." She hands it to him and walks inside.
Rex is left behind with the doctor. "The answer is yes. You're about to make a fortune off us."

 

---

Lynette is driving down the street as her children jump up and down and scream and ignore her as she yells at them to buckle up.

A motorcycle cop sees them and follows them, putting on his siren to pull her over. Lynette sees him and mutters, "Oh, crap."

Once pulled over, the cop walks up to her and looks inside the car, asking for license and registration.

 

When Lynette hands them over, he asks her, "Ma'am, you know why I pulled you over?"
Lynette: "I have a theory."
Cop: "Kids are jumping up and down. They should be sitting, wearing their seat belts."
Lynette: "I yelled at them. They never listen to me. It's very frustrating."
Cop: "Well, you have to find a way to control them. After all, that's your job."

He walks over to his motorcycle, leaving Lynette and the kids.

 

"Though he'd been a policeman for six years, Office Hayes had never found himself in a truly dangerous situation. Then again, he had never before told a woman how to raise her children."

Lynette gets out of the car, slamming the door. Officer Hayes looks up.

 

Lynette: "Are you saying I'm a bad mother?"
Cop: "Ma'am you need to get back in your car, please."

Lynette starts walking towards him slowly.

 

Lynette: "I have no help. My husband is always away on business."
Cop: "I'm gonna have to ask you to step back now." He reaches for the gun on his belt. Lynette ignores him. "My baby-sitter joined the witness relocation program. I haven't slept through the night in six years. And for you to stand there and judge me."

She reaches him, breathing hard. He looks at her kids, who are making faces at him through the back window of the mini van.

 

Cop: "Okay. I'm not gonna give you a ticket. I'm gonna let you off with a warning."
Lynette: "I accept your apology."

She takes her license and registration from him and walks off. When she gets in the car, her kids start yelling again. She starts the car and the officer calls after her, "Buckle up!"

 

---

A woman gets into a car and drives off. Gabrielle, wearing a short black dress, leopard-skin shoes and scarf and sunglasses, steps out of her car and walks up to the house where the car left from. She rings the doorbell and John answers.

 

John: "Mrs. Solis!"
Gabrielle: "Hello, Jonathan."

Inside, he shows her his room, apologizing for the mess.

 

John: "You just missed my mom. On Friday's, she coaches my little sister's soccer team."
Gabrielle: "Ah, yes. I heard that." She picks up a plate from the bed that has a partially eaten sandwich on it and places it on his TV. "Uh, John, we need to talk about what happened the other day."
John: "Mr. Solis isn't starting to catch on, is he?"
Gabrielle: "No, no. He doesn't have a clue, God love him. It's just, I was thinking that when you come over to garden, you might actually have to garden."
John: "Great. You're breaking up with me. In my own bedroom."
Gabrielle: "No, no. I'm not dumping you. Lately, you've been the only thing keeping me going. It's just we can't do it at my house anymore."
John: "Oh. So, then, where do you want to do it?"
Gabrielle: "Well, uh, what time does your mom get back from soccer practice?"
John: "Mrs. Solis."
She clears off a space next to her on the bed. "Better hurry. We don't have a lot of time."

He takes off his shirt and joins her on the bed, kissing her. When he starts to kiss her neck, she looks over to his nightstand, where she sees a photo of him as a young boy, posing for a Little League picture. She frowns and puts the picture face down on the nightstand.

 

---

At the marriage counselor's office, Bree is talking about her children. "And so, there's just the four of us. My oldest son, Andrew, is 16. Danielle is 15, and..." she looks down to rummage through her purse.

 

Dr. Goldfine interrupts her, "I don't need to see pictures. Bree, you've spent most of the hour engaging in small talk."
Bree: "Oh, have I?
Dr. Goldfine: "Yes. Rex has been very vocal about his issues. Don't you want to discuss your feelings about your marriage?"
She sighs. "Um. Doc-"
Rex interrupts. "This is the thing you gotta know about Bree. She doesn't like to talk about her feelings. To be honest, it's hard to know if she has any."

Bree looks at him, shocked.

He continues. "Does she feel anger, rage, ecstasy? Who knows? She's always pleasant. And I can't tell you how annoying that is." As he talks, Bree looks at Dr. Goldfine, who absent-mindedly plays with a loose button in his jacket. Bree focuses on the button, tuning out Rex. She reaches into her purse and pulls out a miniature sewing kit.

 

Dr. Goldfine gets her attention again. She focuses in on him. "I'm sorry."
Dr. Goldfine: "Would you like to respond to what Rex just said?"
Bree: "Oh, um..."
Dr. Goldfine: "Is there some truth there? Do you use housework as a way to disengage emotionally?"
Bree: "Of course not!" She puts the kit back in her purse.

 

---

In John's bedroom, John is lying on his back on his bed, wearing only his boxers. Gabrielle is finishing up getting dressed.

 

John: "Ah. This is great. I got tons of homework tonight. It's so easy to concentrate after sex."
Gabrielle: "Well, I'm glad I could help. Education is very important."
John: "Oh, I've got something for you."

He gets up and goes over to a shelf, where he has a single rose in a glass. He brings it over to her.

 

John: "I was gonna give it to you next time I mowed your lawn, but since you're here."
Gabrielle: "Oh, it's a rose!"
John: "It's not just any rose. Look at the petals. There aren't any flaws. It's perfect."
Gabrielle: "Oh, John."
John: "Just like you."

 

"The truth hit her like a thunderbolt."

 

John: "I spent days looking for just the right one. Finally found it."

 

"For John, this was no longer just a meaningless little affair. Gabrielle could now clearly see he was falling in love with her."

 

Gabrielle: "It's just beautiful."

They smile and she tells him that she has to go. As she leaves, he calls out a goodbye to her.

 

---

Mike gets out of his truck, carrying grocery bags. Susan comes running across his lawn.

 

Susan: "What are we having?"
Mike: "Uh, well, I talked to Julie, and she suggested rib eye steaks." Susan takes one of the bags from him and he thanks her. "Said that's your favorite."
Susan: "Oh, yeah. I love my steak."

They start up his porch and Edie, in her convertible, pulls up, honking at them. "Hi, Mike! Susan."

Mike goes back down the steps to Edie. Susan stays for a minute longer on the porch. "Edie."

 

Mike: "Hey, I'm sorry about your house. How you holding up?"
Edie: "All right, I guess. Oh! Is somebody having a party?" She gets out of her car.
Mike: "No, Susan is just throwing me one of her traditional welcome to the neighborhood dinners. Only I'm cooking. And having it at my house."
Edie: "Traditional. I didn't get one."
Mike: "Oh, it's sort of a new tradition."
Edie: "Well, it won't be anything fancy. Just a little home cooking."
Mike: "Mm, that sounds so good." She leans over to look inside the bags that Mike is holding.

Susan smiles, but stays behind.

 

"Susan suddenly had an awful feeling in the pit of stomach."

Edie: "I've been having nothing but fast food lately."

 

"As if she was watching an accident in slow motion. She knew it would happen, but was powerless to stop it."

Mike turns around and gives Susan a look.

 

Susan: "Edie, would you like to join us for dinner?"
Edie: "Oh, that's so sweet. No. I don't want to intrude. Three's a crowd."
Mike: "No, it's not like that. I mean, Susan's bringing Julie."
Susan: "It's not like that. The more the merrier."
Edie: "Well, this'll be fun."
Mike: "Tomorrow night. We'll eat at six." He turns and heads back up to the house.
Edie: "Great. Oh, and Susan?"
Susan: "Yeah?"
Edie: "This will make up for the dinner you never threw for me."
Susan: "Right."

Edie waves and drives off. Mike comes back to where Susan is. "Should I have told her we were having steak? She's not like, a vegetarian or something, is she?"

Susan mutters, "Oh, no, no. Edie's definitely a carnivore."

 

---

On Lynette's porch, Mrs. Huber watches Edie drive away. Lynette comes out of her house with a box of clothing in her arms. "Here's what I pulled for Edie. I should warn you that most of the clothes in there aren't that stylish."

"Oh, don't worry about it." She starts going through the box. "Edie's a beggar now, which means she can't be a chooser. Of course, we don't have to add salt to the wound." She pulls out one article of clothing and hands it back to Lynette.

 

Lynette: "Listen, I was just getting dinner ready."
Mrs. Huber: "Say no more. I'll get out of your hair." She turns to leave.
Lynette: "No, no." Lynette turns to go back inside the house.
Mrs. Huber: "By the way, was that you I saw getting pulled over by a policeman?"
Lynette: "Yeah, the boys were acting up in the car. I couldn't get them to sit down."
Mrs. Huber: "Young boys can be so willful."
Lynette: "I try everything. I scream. I threaten. I reason. I beg. Nothing works. I don't know if it's because they're too young and they don't understand or they're just getting some perverse joy out of testing me."
Mrs. Huber: "My mother used to have the worst time with me in the car. So one time when I was acting up, she stopped and left me on the side of the road and she drove off."
Lynette: "You're kidding."
Mrs. Huber: "Oh, she came back immediately. But I never misbehaved in the car again. You should try that."
Lynette: "Mrs. Huber, I could never leave my kids by the side of the road."
Mrs. Huber: "When it comes to discipline, sometimes you must be creative. My mother knew that. Smart lady. Of course, she's in a home now. And her mind has just turned to mush."
Lynette: "Well, like I said, I should go back and get dinner ready."
Mrs. Huber: "Oh, right! Well, good bye."
Lynette: "Good bye."

As Mrs. Huber leaves, she sees Susan walking back to her house and calls to her.

 

Mrs. Huber: "Susan! Have you been able to find old clothes for Edie? She has nothing to wear."
Susan: "I thought that was the look she was going for."
Mrs. Huber: "Oh, Susan. Edie may be trash, but she's still a human being."

Mrs. Huber walks off. Susan sees Zack watering the lawn. She takes the letter Mary Alice received out of her pocket and looks at it, then walks up to Zack, asking if his dad is home. "I need to talk to him."

In the garage, Paul has wrapped the chest in plastic and is duct taping it shut. The garage door opens and Susan walks in.

 

Susan: "Hey, Paul. I hope I'm not interrupting."
Paul: "Actually, I was getting ready to go somewhere."
Susan: "I just wanted to come by and say hello. You know, see how you guys are doing."
Paul: "We're trying to move on. It's been pretty tough."
Susan: "I can imagine. Not knowing why Mary Alice - "
Paul: "Why what?" He picks up the chest and begins walking away with it.
Susan: "Why she did it. Oh!" Paul drops the chest and Susan bends down to help him. "Here, let me help you."
Paul: "I got it, I got it."

He puts it in the back of his car.

 

Susan: "Sorry if I upset you."
Paul: "Can I be frank?"
Susan: "Of course."
Paul: "I don't care what her reasons were. Maybe she was depressed. Maybe she was bored. It doesn't matter. She abandoned her husband and her son. And I'll never forgive her."

He gets in the car and drives off, leaving Susan.

A little while later, it's nighttime.

 

"As I watched Susan, I couldn't help feeling sorry for her. She wanted so much to know why I did it."

Susan puts the letter in a box in her house.

 

"Why I killed myself."

Paul has reached his destination. He opens up the trunk and takes the chest out.

 

"It's not enough to want the truth. You must know where to look for it. And the truth is elusive because it knows where to hide."

Paul carries the chest over to a railing on a bridge and throws it over, where it lands in a body of water, slowly sinking out of sight.

 

---

Julie is at home. Mrs. Huber knocks on the door.

 

Mrs. Huber: "Hello, Julie. I talked to your mom about donating some clothes for Edie."
Julie: "She's at Mrs. Van De Kamp's, but I'll see if she left some stuff upstairs."

She goes upstairs, leaving the door open. Mrs. Huber walks in and starts rifling through the grocery bags on the kitchen table. She takes out some perfume and sprays it on herself. Then she sees a new measuring cup, identical in make to the burnt one she had found at Edie's. Holding it, she stares off into space, thinking.

Julie comes back downstairs, sees Mrs. Huber holding the measuring cup, and looks suspicious.

 

Mrs. Huber: "Oh, Julie! I was just admiring your new measuring cup."
Julie takes it from Mrs. Huber. "Yeah, we lost ours."
Mrs. Huber: "Really."
Julie: "So I couldn't find the clothes. I'm sorry.
Mrs. Huber: "That's okay.
Julie: "If you want me to keep looking."
Mrs. Huber: "No. You've done more than enough. Truly." She leaves.

Julie stands there, looking confused.

 

---

Bree is in Dr. Goldfine's waiting room. Dr. Goldfine comes out of his office.

 

Dr. Goldfine: "Bree. Rex just called. He won't be able to meet you here today. Apparently, there was an emergency at the hospital."
Bree: "Oh. Well, I wish he had called me." She gets up, ready to leave.
Dr. Goldfine: "He suggested perhaps you'd like to meet with me by yourself. You've been very quiet in our joint sessions."

Bree focuses in on the button still hanging loosely from Dr. Goldfine's jacket.

 

Bree: "What? Oh, oh, oh no thank you. I have some things that I need to do today."
Dr. Goldfine: "Are you sure?"
Bree: "Uh, yeah. I'm sure."
Dr. Goldfine: "Okay."

He goes in his office. Bree starts to leave, but is hesitant, as though she's trying to make a decision about something. Finally, she strides purposefully back to Dr. Goldfine's door and knocks on it. When she enters, she says, "Dr. Goldfine, there is something you can do for me."

 

Dr. Goldfine: "What's that?"
Bree: "Take off your coat." She closes the door behind her.

 

---

Susan and Gabrielle walk into Gabrielle's house, laden down with shopping bags.

 

Gabrielle: "So now you're taking Julie on your dinner date with Mike?"
Susan: "Yeah, well, if Edie's gonna be there, I'm gonna need emotional support."
Gabrielle: "I can't believe she wormed her way into in. How did you let her do that?"
Susan: "I don't know. I was gonna take her out at the knees, but it all happened so fast."
Gabrielle: "Well, you know what you need to do. You need to get there early, spend a little bit of time with Mike before the little barracuda gets there."
Susan: "That's a good idea. Edie will get there at 5:45 which means her breasts will arrive at 5:30, so I should shoot for five."
Gabrielle: "Atta girl. I'm just gonna take these upstairs." She starts collecting her packages.

Susan clutches her shopping bag. "I'm gonna keep my one little bag and go home."

As she heads toward the door, she sees the rose that John gave Gabrielle on the front hall table.

 

Susan: "That is a beautiful rose. Where did you get it?"
Gabrielle: "Oh, John gave it to me." Gabrielle freezes after saying that.
Susan: "John? Your gardener? He gave you a rose?"
Gabrielle: "Yes. I am having some new bushes planted outside and he gave me that as a color palette."
Susan: "Oh! Okay."

She shrugs and turns to leave. "Sure is beautiful, isn't it?" She leaves.

Gabrielle stares at the rose. "Yes, it is."

 

---

In Dr. Goldfine's office, he watches Bree sew the button back onto his jacket.

 

Dr. Goldfine: "I'm sure Freud would not approve of this."
Bree: "Oh, who cares what he thinks. I took psychology in college. We learned all about Freud. A miserable human being."
Dr. Goldfine: "What makes you say that?"
Bree: "Well, think about it. He grew up in the late 1800s. There were no appliances back then. His mother had to do everything by hand, just backbreaking work from sunup to sundown, not to mention the countless other sacrifices she probably had to make to take care of her family. And what does he do? He grows up and becomes famous, peddling a theory that the problems of most adults can be traced back to something awful their mother has done. She must have felt so betrayed. He saw how hard she worked. He saw what she did for him. Did he even ever think to say thank you? I doubt it."

She finishes up the coat and puts it on him. "There you go."

 

Dr. Goldfine: "Just so you know, many of Freud's theories have been discredited."
Bree: "Good."

 

---

In the car, Lynette's children are misbehaving again. She pleads with them to tell them to sit down and how they'll be in trouble if they don't sit down in the seats. The boys become quiet, but only to whisper in each other's ears. After the whispering they all turn to look at her, grinning.

 

"For the first time, Lynette could see that this was not the innocent play of children. She was being challenged. So, she decided it was time to get creative."

She pulls over and opens the car door. "Out. Can't behave, you heard me. You cannot ride. You. Out. Move it."

She closes the door and gets back in, looking back at her kids once before driving off. The kids watch her. "Where is she going?"

She pulls around a corner and stops the car. She looks at her watch and then looks at her baby in the car seat next to her. "Mommy's a genius." After a few minutes, she backtracks and goes to pick up the boys.

They're gone.

Shocked, she stops the car and tells her baby that "mommy will be right back." She rushes out to where she left them, calling for them.

A woman comes out of the house where Lynette is running on the lawn. "Porter! Preston! Parker! If you're hiding, you've gotta stop now, because mommy doesn't think it's funny."

 

Lynette: "Oh! Excuse me, I'm sorry, I'm looking for my boys. Three boys with red hair. Have you seen them?"
Lady: "Yeah. I also saw you drive away and leave them."
Lynette: "I know. I was just trying to scare them into behaving. Did you see where they went?"
Lady: "Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're in my kitchen."
Lynette: "Oh!"
Lady: "Listen, it seems to me like you have some anger management issues."
Lynette: "I have four kids under the age of six. I absolutely have anger management issues."

She goes to walk past the woman, but the woman stops her.

 

Lady: "Yeah, well, I think you need to talk to somebody because abandoning your children is--"
Lynette: "I didn't abandon them. I came back!"
Lady: "I'm just saying...it's not normal."
Lynette: "Yeah, well, my kids aren't normal. And now I don't have time for this lady. So--" she starts to go past the woman again, who stops her again. "Boys! Get out here."
Lady: "No, I don't think they should go anywhere until you calm down."

The boys show up at the door, holding cookies. Lynette sees them and tells them to get in the car. One of the twins tells her that they have cookies.

 

Lynette: "Well, bring them. We're leaving."
Lady: "No, no, no, stay put."
Lynette: "I don't think so." As she tries to go past the woman, the woman grabs her arm.
Lady: "Listen, lady, you and I are gonna have a little talk."
Twin: "Leave my mommy alone!"
Lynette: "Let go of me! What's the matter with you?"

The twins bite her and push her over.

 

Lynette: "Run, boys, run!"

They all get into the car.

The lady gets up. "You get back here!"

 

Lynette: "Boys, you're gonna need to put on your---" the boys have already put on their seat belts.

Lynette looks surprised, but proud.

As the car drives off, the lady calls out, "Get back or I'm gonna call social services!"

 

---

Gabrielle is sitting on the staircase, staring happily at the rose on the table. A horn honks. She looks out the window and her jaw drops.

She goes outside. "Oh my God." Carlos is standing next to a convertible with a big red ribbon on it.

 

Gabrielle: "Carlos, what have you done?"
Carlos: "I saw it when I drove by the dealership. I thought, Gabrielle would look so beautiful in this."
Gabrielle: "Carlos!" She shoves him playfully.
Carlos: "It cost me an arm and a leg. It's got GPS navigation, 200 watt stereo system, rear parking sensor..."
Gabrielle: "It's beautiful!"
Carlos: "So? Did I take your breath away?"
Gabrielle: "Absolutely!"
Carlos: "Is it the best gift you've ever gotten?"

 

"Gabrielle could see what this gesture had cost Carlos so she responded the only way she knew how."

She kisses him and jumps up on him, wrapping her legs around him as they kiss.

Across the street, John is raking a neighbor's lawn. He sees the car, Carlos, and Gabrielle, and watches them, looking sad and hurt.

 

"She had a feeling the truth would have been lost on her husband anyway. After all, it's the rare man who understands the value of a single, perfect rose."

 

---

Susan walks up the pathway to Mike's house. When she gets on the porch, Bongo, who was sleeping there, starts barking. She pushes the doorbell. Mike opens it.

 

Mike: "Susan!"
Susan: "I hope you don't mind. I thought I'd come by early and help you set up."
Mike: "Oh. Um."
Edie comes out of the kitchen. "Hey, Susan. Don't worry. Mike and I have everything under control."
Susan: "Oh."

Bongo barks.

 

Mike: "Bongo! I don't know why he barks at you."
Edie: "I wouldn't take it personally. Dogs are very sensitive."

She walks over to Bongo and starts petting him and talking to him.

 

"In the distance, Susan thought she heard a bell ring."

Susan looks at Mike, who's watching Edie and Bongo with a smile on his face.

 

"Round one had started."

 

---

Rex and Bree are at Dr. Goldfine's office.

 

Rex: "Look, all I'm saying is that this whole 'it takes two to mess up a marriage' theory is bull. The problems that we have are because of her."
Bree: "That is not true, Rex."
Rex: "All right, fine. What have I been doing for the past 20 years that has been so awful?"

Dr. Goldfine looks down at his jacket as he fingers the newly repaired button.

 

Rex: "You're not saying anything because I've been a great husband and it kills you to admit that."
Dr. Goldfine: "Rex, I'm curious. Do you ever acknowledge the benefits of living with Bree?"
Rex: "Huh?"
Dr. Goldfine: "By your own admission, your home is always clean, your clothes are always freshly pressed, sounds like a wonderful cook. Despite her flaws, do you ever remember to say thank you?
Rex: "Thank you."
Dr. Goldfine: "Yes."

Bree looks satisfied.

 

---

At Mike's house, Mike, Susan, Julie, and Edie are finishing up their meal. Bongo puts his paws on the table and begins licking some of the gravy off of Edie's plate.

Mike tells Bongo to get off the table and Edie pushes Bongo down.

 

Mike turns to Susan. "So, who's the guy that lives across from Mrs. Huber, again?"
Susan: "That's Mr. Mullin. And just so you know, if he invites you in, you have to meet all of his pets."
Mike: "That's okay. I love animals."
Susan: "He's a taxidermist."
Mike: "Oh. Thanks for the warning."

They laugh.

 

Edie: "Isn't Mr. Mullin's brother your divorce attorney?"
Susan: "Uh, yes. yes, he was."
Edie: "Can I say something?"

Susan gestures that she should go ahead.

 

Edie: "In my heart, I still believe that you and Carl are going to get back together."
Mike: "Really?"
Edie: "Oh, yeah. I've never seen two people more in love. I'm mean, she's never going to find that kind of chemistry with another man. Never!"

 

"It was everything Susan could do to keep a smile on her face. Round two was under way and she was already taking a beating."

Julie: "You know what, Mrs. Britt?"

"What Edie hadn't counted on,"

Julie: "Do you know who I always liked?"

"Was that Susan had someone else in her corner."

Julie: "Mr. Roswell, your fourth husband.
Edie: "Oh, he was my second husband. I've only been married twice."

She glances at Mike, who smiles.

 

Julie: "Twice? You weren't married to the guy with all the tattoos that they took away in handcuffs?"
Susan: "No, Julie, she wasn't married to Javier. That was just one of her special friends." She laughs. "I think we should change the subject. You know, unless you want to keep talking about it."

Bongo puts his paws on the table again to lick off of Edie's plate.

Edie stands up, telling them that she wants to show them what she taught Bongo earlier. She holds some food in the air, and Bongo gets on his hind legs to beg for it.

 

"Susan was furious with Edie for using a dog to ingratiate herself with its owner. She was also furious with Mike for not seeing through this blatant maneuver."

Susan stands up and started clearing the table, telling them that she was going to get the desserts.

 

"But most of all, she was furious with herself for not having thought of it first."

In the kitchen, she puts the plates down and looks off in the direction of the dining room, where Mike is commenting that he can barely get Bongo to sit.

Susan sees the gravy dish and picks it up.

In the dining room, Mike says that he's never seen Bongo walk on two legs. Edie replies that he knows who to come to.

In the kitchen, Susan makes a decision. She puts down the gravy and then dabs her fingers in it. She rubs some on the back of her hand and some more behind her ear.

She carries the dessert out. When she's done passing it out, she backs away to where Bongo is, offering her hand for him to sniff. He starts licking her, and she makes a happy sound, drawing Mike's attention to her.

 

Mike: "Oh, look at that. Looks like Bongo's finally warming up to Susan."

Susan kneels down and Bongo starts licking her around her ear. "We just got off on the wrong foot. We're best buddies now."

Mike and Julie smile at Susan while Edie watches, stone-faced.

Suddenly, Bongo starts choking.

 

Susan: "Bongo, are you okay?"
Edie: "What's wrong with him?"
Mike: "I dunno. I've never heard him make that sound."

He rushes to Bongo's side.

Julie gestures to Susan, pointing to her own ear. Susan puts her hand up to feel for her earrings. One is gone.

Mike notices the same time Susan does and they look at the dog.

Mike carries Bongo out to his car, telling Edie and Susan to call the vet. Edie calls out that they will, and to not worry, that she'll stay and clean up everything.

 

Susan: "Is there anything I can do?"
Mike: "No."

He drives off.

 

---

At the vet, Mike paces back and forth. Susan comes in.

 

Susan: "Hey."
Mike: "Hey."
Susan: "How's Bongo doing?"
Mike: "I'm just waiting to see if they have to operate."
Susan: "Oh, God. [she pulls a large dog bone out of her purse.] Uh, I, I stopped and I got this. I am just so sorry for this."
Mike: "I'm really sorry that I snapped at you. I was just so worried."
Susan: "Oh, no. It's okay."

The vet comes out of the back room.

 

Vet: "Good news. We won't have to do surgery."
Susan: "Oh, that's great!"
Vet: "And we gave Bongo something to help pass the earring. When he does, would you like us to retrieve it for you?"
Susan: "Ah, I'm gonna say no."
Vet: "Okay. You should be able to take him home in about an hour."

He goes back into the back.

Mike and Susan turn away from the front desk.

 

Susan: "Wow. you must be so relieved."
Mike: "I'm sorry. I was just really worried."
Susan: "Well, it was your dog. I get it."
Mike: "Actually, it was my wife's dog. One of the last things she said to me in the hospital before she died was to be sure I looked after him. I promised her I would."

 

"And just like that, Susan could suddenly see something she'd never seen before."

 

Mike: "He, uh, meant so much to her."

 

"Mike Delfino was still in love with his late wife."

 

Mike: "And if something had happened, I would have felt like I had failed her. I know that sounds stupid, but, I--"

 

"And she knew right then that neither she nor Edie would be laying claim to his heart anytime soon."

 

Susan: "No, it doesn't. Not at all."

 

"So, she decided for now, she could settle for just being his friend."

Susan took the dog bone and handed it over to Mike. "This is for you. Well, for Bongo. Give it to him.

 

---

At Mike's house, Edie finishes up cleaning. She takes oil and vinegar and places them in a cupboard.

Hidden behind a different cupboard, next to where Edie had put the oil and vinegar lies money, maps, and detailed information and pictures about the people who live on Wisteria Lane.

 

"Yes. As I look back at the world I left behind, it's all so clear to me. The beauty that waits to be unveiled. The mysteries that long to be uncovered. But people so rarely stop to take a look. They just keep moving. It's a shame, really. There's so much to see."

The chest that Paul had thrown in the water pops up suddenly, bobbing gently.

 

~ The End ~

Desperate Housewives - Episode 01.01 - Pilot

 

---

Guest stars

"Mrs. Martha Huber" - Christine Estabrook
"Tom Scavo" - Doug Savant
"Danielle Van De Kamp" - Joy Lauren
"Andrew Van De Kamp" - Shawn Pyfrom
"Preston Scavo" - Brent Kinsman
"Porter Scavo" - Shane Kinsman
"Parker Scavo" - Zane Huett
"Wendy" - Sherica Durdley
"Natalie Klein" - Nike Doukas
"Waiter" - Heath McCall
"Elderly Lady" - Kay Wade
"Tanaka Party Waiter" - Edward Zoellner

Written by: Marc Cherry & Charles Pratt, Jr.
Directed by: Charles McDougall

 

---

Overview of a nice, upscale neighborhood. Cars are driving by, people are taking walks and pushing baby carriages while saying hello to each other.

Focus on house where a woman steps outside, carrying a basket of flowers. Her voice is the one in the voiceover.

 

"My name is Mary Alice Young. When you read this morning's paper, you may come across an article about the unusual day I had last week. Normally, there is never anything newsworthy about my life. But that all changed last Thursday."

As she talks, we see snippets of what she's describing.

"Of course, everything seemed quite normal at first. I made breakfast for my family. I performed my chores. I completed my projects. I ran my errands. In truth, I spent the day as I spent every other day, quietly polishing the routine of my life. Until it gleamed with perfection. That's why it was so astonishing when I decided to go to my hallway closet and retrieve a revolver that had never been used."

Mary Alice holds the gun to her head and pulls the trigger. The gun goes off and in the reflection of a mirror, Mary Alice falls to the floor.

 

---

A woman reaches down into a pile of red, blood-like liquid, dips her finger into it, and raises it to her lips to taste it, then turns to look out her window when she hears the shot. The voiceover continues.

 

"My body was discovered by my neighbor, Mrs. Martha Huber, who had been startled by a strange popping sound. Her curiosity aroused, Mrs. Huber tried to think of a reason for dropping in on me unannounced."

Mrs. Huber goes to her hallway closet and removes a blender that has a label on it reading "Property of Mary Alice Young"

She leaves her house and hurries over next door.

 

"After some initial hesitation, she decided to return the blender she borrowed six months before."

Mrs. Huber goes to the front door and rings the bell, waits, then rings it again. She then goes around the house and peeks through a window. Seeing the body on the floor, she screams and rushes back to her house to call 911.

 

"It's my neighbor. I think she's been shot. There's blood everywhere! Yes, you've got to send an ambulance. You've got to send one right now!"

She hangs up.

 

"And for a moment, Mrs. Huber stood motionless in her kitchen, grief-stricken by this senseless tragedy. But only for a moment."

Mrs. Huber turns to look at the blender with its label firmly attached.

 

"And if there's one thing Mrs. Huber was known for..."

Mrs. Huber tears off the label on the blender.

 

"...it was her ability to look on the bright side."

She puts the blender back in the closet.

 

---

Many people go to Mary Alice Young's house, dressed solemnly.

 

"I was laid to rest on Monday. After the funeral, all the residents of Wisteria Lane came to pay their respects. And as people do in these situations, they brought food. Lynette Scavo brought fried chicken."

Lynette, caring a large platter of chicken, looks drawn and tired.

 

"Lynette had a great family recipe for fried chicken. Of course, she didn't cook much while she was climbing up the corporate ladder."

Flashback to Lynette in a boardroom, giving a presentation to a group of people.

 

"She didn't have the time. But when her doctor announced Lynette was pregnant..."

Flashback to Lynette in her doctor's office, getting the ultrasound. Lynette is grinning, obviously excited.

 

"...her husband, Tom, had an idea. 'Why not quit your job? Kids do better with stay at home moms. It would be so much less stressful.'"

Lynette hesitantly nods her agreement at him, her smile gone.

Present time, Lynette continues walking down the sidewalk, holding the chicken platter and pushing a stroller. As she walks, her other three children, all little boys, two of whom are twins, walk in front of the stroller, the twins pushing each other as they walk.

 

"But this was not the case. In fact, Lynette's life had become so hectic, she was now forced to get her fried chicken from a fast food restaurant. Lynette would have appreciated the irony if she had stopped to think about it."

Lynette tries to break up her children's fight as it gets more physical. She kneels down in front of them, angry.

 

"Listen to me. You are going to behave today. I will not going to be humiliated in front of the entire neighborhood. And, just so you know how serious I am..." [she pulls a piece of paper out of her jacket].

One of her boys asks, "What's that?"

 

Lynette: "Santa's cell phone number."
Twin: "How'd you get that?"
Lynette: "I know someone who knows someone who knows an elf. And if any of you acts up, so help me, I will call Santa and tell him you want socks for Christmas. Are you willing to risk that?"

They shake their heads no.

She straights up. "All right, let's get this over with."

The camera pans to a Hispanic man in a suit, standing outside of a beautiful house. He turns to watch his gorgeous wife hurry down the steps to meet him.

 

"Gabrielle Solis, who lives down the block, brought a spicy paella."

Flashback to Gabrielle when she was younger, walking down the runway as a fashion model.

 

"Since her modeling days in New York, Gabrielle had developed a taste for rich food and rich men."

Flashback to a restaurant, where Gabrielle and the man are having dinner.

 

"Carlos, who worked in mergers and acquisitions, proposed on their third date. Gabrielle was touched when tears welled up in his eyes. But she soon discovered that this happened every time Carlos closed a big deal."

Present time, where Gabrielle joins Carlos as he waits for her.

 

"Gabrielle liked her paella piping hot. However, her relationship with her husband was considerably cooler."

Carlos and Gabrielle walk down the street. Carlos tells Gabrielle that if she talks with Mason at the wake, she's to casually mention to him how much he paid for her necklace.

Gabrielle retorts "Why don't I just pin the receipt to my chest?"

Carlos explains that Mason let him know how much he had paid for his wife's convertible. He tells her to just work it into the conversation. Gabrielle says she can't just work it in.

 

Carlos: "Why not? At the Donahue party, everyone was talking mutual funds and you found a way to mention you slept with half of the Yankee outfielders."
Gabrielle: "I'm telling you, it came up in the context of the conversation."
Carlos: "Hey! People are starting to stare. Can you keep your voice down?"
Gabrielle: "Absolutely. Wouldn't want people to think we're not happy."

 

---

The door to the Young's house opens to show a well-groomed woman standing outside with her husband, son, and daughter. She's holding two baskets full of baked goods.

 

"Bree Van De Kamp, who lives next door, brought baskets of muffins she baked from scratch. Bree was known for her cooking, and for making her own clothes, and for doing her own gardening, and for re-upholstering her own furniture. Yes, Bree's many talents were known throughout the neighborhood. And everyone on Wisteria Lane thought of Bree as the perfect wife and mother. Everyone, that is, except her own family."

Bree walks in, with her husband and children following behind her.

She goes up to Paul and Zachary Young to offer her condolences. They tell her that she didn't need to go through so much trouble, and she says that it was no trouble at all.

She explains that one of the baskets is for the guests and the other is just for Paul and Zachary and those are "breakfast type things." As she talks, her family silently looks at each other. She hands Paul and Zachary the muffins and reminds them that she will need the baskets back. Behind her, her husband briefly closes his eyes.

 

---

A woman leaves her house with her teenage daughter. She's carrying a casserole dish with aluminum foil covering it. The foil comes off the dish and the woman has to grab it before it flies away.

 

"Susan Mayer, who lives across the street, brought macaroni and cheese. Her husband Carl, always teased her, saying it was the only thing she knew how to cook, and she rarely made it well. It was too salty the night she and Carl moved into their house. It was too watery the night she found lipstick on Carl's shirt. She burned it the night Carl told her he was leaving her for his secretary."

Flashback to Carl leaving the house with suitcases as Susan and her daughter sit at the kitchen table, a macaroni and cheese dinner in front of them. Susan begins to cry. Her daughter leans over and pats her mother's arm.

In present time, Susan and her daughter leave their house and begin walking towards the Young's house.

 

"A year had passed since the divorce. Susan had started to think how nice it would be to have a man in her life, even one who would make fun of her cooking."

As they walk, Susan's daughter asks, "Mom, why would someone kill themselves?"

 

Susan: "Well, sometimes people are so unhappy, they think that's the only way they can solve their problems. "
Julie: "But Mrs. Young always seemed happy."
Susan: "Yeah. But sometimes, people pretend to be one way on the outside, when they're totally different on the inside."
Julie: "Oh, you mean like how dad's girlfriend is always smiling and says nice things, but deep down, you just know she's a bitch? "
Susan: "I don't like that word, Julie. But yeah, that's a great example."

They reach the house and go inside. Susan puts the macaroni and cheese on the table with the other food. She heads to the kitchen where the other three women are sitting. They say hello. Susan looks at Mary Alice's chair and then picks up the coffee to pour herself a cup.

Flashback to when all five of the women were drinking coffee together at that table when Susan's husband left her.

 

Mary Alice: "So what did Carl say when you confronted him?"
Susan: "You'll love this. He said, it doesn't mean anything. It was just sex."

The women all scoff. She continues. "And then he got this Zen look on his face and said, you know, Susan, most men live lives of quiet desperation."

 

Lynette: "Please tell me you punched him."
Susan: "No, I said, really? And what do most women lead? Lives of noisy fulfillment?"

The women offer support.

 

Susan: "I mean, of all people, did he have to bang his secretary? I had that woman over for brunch."
Gabrielle: "It's like my grandmother always said. An erect penis doesn't have a conscious."
Lynette: "Even limp ones aren't all that ethical."

Bree joins in, saying that that's the reason she joined the NRA.

 

"When Rex started going to those medical conferences, I wanted it in the back of his mind that he had a loving wife at home with a loaded Smith & Wesson."

They laugh.

Mary Alice asks Lynette if she's worried about her husband, since he's always away on business. Lynette says that he's gotten her pregnant three times in four years. "I wish he was having sex with someone else."

They ask Susan if he'll stop seeing the woman and she says she doesn't know.

 

Susan: "I just don't know how I'm going to survive this."
Mary Alice: "Listen to me. We all have moments of desperation. But if we face them head on, that's when we find out just how strong we really are."

Susan puts her hand on Mary Alice's.

In present time, Bree interrupts Susan's memories, saying that Paul wants them to come over on Friday to go through Mary Alice's closet and pack up her things, as he can't face doing it himself. Susan agrees. Bree asks if she's okay. Susan tells her "I'm just so angry. If Mary Alice was having problems, she should have come to us. She should have let us help her."

Gabrielle asks what problems she could have had. "She was healthy, had a great home, a nice family. Her life was - "

Lynette interrupts. "Our life." They're all quiet.

Gabrielle says that if Mary Alice had been having problems, they would have known, because she only lives 50 feet away. Susan tells her, "Gabby, the woman killed herself. Something must have been going on."

Off to the side, unbeknownst to the women, Paul Young listens to their conversation, grim-faced. He takes a sip of his drink.

 

---

Later, at the buffet, Susan comes up to a man putting some macaroni and cheese on his plate. She tells him not to eat it. He asks her why. She replies with "I made it, trust me." He starts to take a bite and she stops him. "Hey, hey, do you have a death wish?" He answers with "No, I just refuse to believe that anybody can screw up macaroni and cheese."

He puts some in his mouth and Susan looks apologetic as she holds up her hands as though to say that she warned him.

He starts to chew, then stops.

 

"Oh my god. How did you - it tastes like it's burnt and undercooked."
"Yeah, I get that a lot."

She takes a napkin and has him spit the food into it.

He thanks her, then introduces himself as Mike Delfino. He says that he's renting the Sims house. She introduces herself and he says that he heard about her from Mrs. Huber, and that he heard that she illustrates children's books.

 

"Yeah, I'm very big with the under five set."

She laughs at her own joke and he chuckles. She asks what he does and he tells her that he's a plumber. "So if you ever have a clog.. or something" They smile and she looks away. She looks at the mac and cheese. "Now that everybody's seen that I've brought something, I should probably just throw this out." She picks up the mac and cheese as he watches her.

Across the room, Julie looks on, interested.

She walks away and he watches her go. She turns around as she walks, and he smiles at her. She smiles back.

Mrs. Huber finds Lynette as she's breast feeding her infant. Lynette tells her child "Ease up, little vampire."

Mrs. Huber says that she's been looking for her. "Are you aware of what your sons are doing?"

Her boys are swimming in the Young's swimming pool. Lynette comes rushing down to the pool. Looking around at everybody, she then leans down. "What are you doing? We are at a wake!"

Her boys say that she told them they could go in the pool. She clarifies that she told them they could go by the pool. She asks if they have their swimsuits on. They say that they put them on before they left. Lynette's furious. "You three planned this?" She picks up their clothing and tells them to get out. They refuse. She tells them "I am your mother. You have to do as I say." They tell her that she can't stop them from swimming.

Lynette looks around and sees everybody watching her. She then looks at her boys, who have their arms crossed as they glare at her.

She makes a decision and hands her baby to the priest. She then wades into the pool, fully clothed. They start to swim away, but she grabs them anyway. Susan, watching from the side, looks embarrassed for her.

Lynette drags her children out, takes back her baby, and tells Paul that they have to leave. "Once again, I am so sorry for your loss."

She leaves with her children.

 

"Lynette shouldn't have been so concerned about my husband. He had other things on his mind. Things below the surface."

Paul looks down in the depths of the pool.

 

---

"The morning after my funeral, my friends and neighbors quietly went back to their busy, busy lives."

Lynette's children are throwing cereal everywhere while she tries to calm them.

"While some did their cooking, and some did their cleaning..."

Bree cleans toilet, furiously.

"...and some did their yoga..."

Gabrielle quietly does yoga on her front porch.

"...others did their homework."

A soccer ball is kicked over Mike Delfino's house into his backyard.

The doorbell rings at Mike's house. Julie is shown to have rung it. Mike answers the door as his dog barks and Mike bends down to hold onto its collar.

 

"Hi. I'm Julie. I kicked my soccer ball into your backyard."
"Okay, well, let's go around and go get it."

He walks outside with her, telling his dog to stay.

 

---

Later that day, Julie, tossing the soccer ball in her hands, talks to her mom.

 

"His wife died a year ago. He wanted to stay in L.A., but there were too many memories. He's renting for tax purposes, but he hopes to buy a place real soon."

Susan tells her daughter that she can't believe she went over there. Julie replies that she saw them flirting at the wake.

 

"You're obviously into each other. Now that you know he's single, you can ask him out."

Susan says that she likes him, but she doesn't know if she's ready to start dating again. Julie says that she needs to get out there. She asks her mom, "how long has it been since you've had sex?"

Susan stops what she's doing and looks at her daughter.

 

"Are you mad that I asked you that?"
"No, I'm just trying to remember. I don't want to talk to you about my love life anymore. It weirds me out."

Julie says that she wouldn't have said anything, except that she heard her dad's girlfriend ask if Susan has dated anyone since the divorce and "dad said he doubted it. And then they both laughed." Susan stares at her daughter, silent and shocked.

 

---

Susan walks determinedly down the street to Mike's house. In her hands, she carries a small house plant. When she reaches his place, she rings the bell.

He opens the door.

 

"Hey, Susan."
"Hi, Mike. I brought you a house warming gift."

She says that she should have come by earlier. He says that she's the first in the neighborhood to stop by. She's happily surprised. "Really!"

"Susan knew she was lucky. An eligible bachelor had moved onto Wisteria Lane and she was the first to find out. But she also know that good news... "

Edie Britt calls out, Hello there! as she comes up to join Susan and Mike on the porch.

"...travels quickly. Edie Britt was the most predatory divorcee in a 5-block radius."

Scenes of Edie are shown as she seduces a plumber, then a tennis instructor, and then a priest.

"Her conquests were numerous. Varied. And legendary."

Edie has a covered dish in her hands as she bounds up the porch, says hi to Susan, and then introduces herself to Mike. Susan watches as they shake hands.

"Susan had met the enemy and she was a slut."

Mike takes the food and thanks her.

 

"What's this?"
"Sausage putinesca. Just something I threw together."

Susan gives her a knowing look. Mike thanks her.

 

"That's great. I'd invite you both in, but I was sort of in the middle of something."

They both protest that it's no problem, they had to go anyway.

"And just like that, the race for Mike Delfino had begun."

The two woman walk away together, with Mike watching them while still holding the housewarming gifts.

"For a moment, Susan wondered if her rivalry with Edie would remain friendly."

Edie turns around to face Mike. "Oh, Mike! I heard you're a plumber?"

"But she was reminded that when it came to men..."

Edit continues. "Do you think you could stop by later tonight and take a look at my pipes?"

Mike answers her. "Sure."

Susan sighs. She and Edie continue walking.

 

Edie: "Bye, Susan."
Susan: "Hmm."

They separate.

 

---

At Gabrielle and Carlos's house, Gabrielle is shouting that Carlos can't order her around. She tells him that she's not going.

 

Carlos: "It's business. Tanaka expects everyone to bring their wives."
Gabrielle: "Every time I'm around that man, he tries to grab my ass."
Carlos: "I made over 0,000 with him last week. If he wants to grab your ass, you let him."

He walks away from her, out of the house.

He sees the 16-year-old gardener, John, and calls his name. John is startled and cuts his finger. Carlos asks him why a bush is still there, since John was supposed to get rid of it last week. John says he didn't have time. Carlos says that he doesn't want to hear any more excuses. Just get rid of it.

Gabrielle comes out of the house and tells Carlos that she hates the way that he talks to her. He replies with "and I really hate that I spent ,000 on a diamond necklace that you couldn't live without. But I've learned to deal with it. So, can I tell Tanaka we'll be there tomorrow night?"

Before answering him, Gabrielle turns to John and tells him that they have bandages in the kitchen. He goes inside.

Gabrielle tells Carlos that she'll go, but "I'm keeping my back pressed against the wall the entire time." Carlos backs away, smiling as he walks. "See? Now this is what a marriage is all about. Compromise."

In the kitchen, John puts on a band-aid. Gabrielle asks him if his finger is okay. He says yes, it was just a small cut. She asks to look at it. She holds his finger up to her eye level and then kisses the band-aid that's wrapped around it. Then she starts licking his finger, and before long, they start kissing each other.

John backs away after a couple of seconds, telling her "I really like it when we hook up, but I just gotta get my work done. I can't afford to lose this...job, and..."

He watches as she takes off her shirt and leans back seductively on a table in the kitchen.

She tells him that the table she's sitting on is hand carved and it's imported from Italy.

 

Gabrielle: "It cost him ,000."
John [chuckles] "So you wanna do it on the table this time?"
Gabrielle: "Absolutely."

She pulls off his shirt and they lean back together onto the table, kissing.

 

---

Dinner time at Bree's house.

Aside from some soft classical music in the background, the only sound is the clinking of silverware on the plates. Danielle and Andrew are picking at the food. Danielle asks her why they can't ever have normal soup. Bree smiles and responds "Danielle, there is nothing abnormal about basil puree." Danielle asks if they can't, just once, have a soup that somebody's heard of, like french onion, or navy bean.

 

Bree: "First of all, your father can't eat onions. He's deathly allergic."

She looks at her husband, who's slowly eating, his eyes averted.

 

Bree: "And I won't even dignify your navy bean suggestion." [She turns to Andrew] "So, how's the osso buco?"
Andrew: "It's okay."
Bree: "It's okay? Andrew, I spent three hours cooking this meal. How do you think it makes me feel when you say it's okay in that sullen tone?"
Andrew: "Who asked you to spend three hours on dinner?"
Bree [shocked]: "Excuse me?"

Her husband looks down at his plate.

 

Andrew: "Tim Harper's mom gets home from work, pops open a can of pork and beans, and boom, they're eating. Everyone's happy."
Bree: "You'd rather I serve pork and beans?"

Danielle turns to her brother. "Apologize now, I am begging you."

 

Andrew: "I'm saying, do you always have to serve cuisine? Can't we just have food?
Bree: "Are you doing drugs?"
Andrew: "What?"
Bree: "Change in behavior is one of the warning signs and you have been fresh as paint over the last six months. That would explain why you're always locked in the bathroom."
Danielle: "Trust me, that is not what he is doing."
Andrew: "Shut up."

He tells his mom that he doesn't have a problem and that she acts like she's running for mayor of Stepford. Bree looks to Rex for support.

 

"Rex. Seeing that you're the head of this household, I would really appreciate you saying something."
"Pass the salt."

 

---

At a grocery store.

"Three days after my funeral, Lynette replaced her grief with a much more useful emotion. Indignation."

Lynette is on the phone to Tom's voice mail while shopping. She says in her message that it's the fifth time she's left a message and he still hasn't called her back.

 

"Well, you must be having a lot of fun on your business trip. I can only imagine. Well, guess what, the kids and I want to have some fun, too, so unless you call me back by noon, we are getting on a plane and joining you."

As she's talking, the twins grab a cart and race off. Her third boy watches them go and tries to get Lynette's attention. Lynette tells him "Not now, Mommy's threatening Daddy." Suddenly, she notices that the twins are gone.

They're walking down an aisle, throwing tons of food into the cart.

Lynette goes off searching for them and runs into Natalie Kline, a well-dressed woman. Lynette mutters "crap" when Natalie recognizes her, but then smiles at her. They make small talk. Lynette asks how the firm is doing, and Natalie tells her that everyone misses her. "We all say that if you hadn't quit, you'd be running the place by now. So. How's domestic life? Don't you just love being a mom?"

"And there it was. The question that Lynette always dreaded."

 

Lynette: "Well, to be honest..."

"For those who asked it, only one answer was acceptable. So Lynette responded as she always did. She lied."

 

Lynette: "It's the best job I've ever had."

Behind her, near the check out lanes, her boys run the cart into an older woman, who trips and falls down. Lynette closes her eyes.

 

---

Outside of Gabrielle and Carlos's bedroom, a school bus goes by. John and Gabrielle are in bed, with Gabrielle smoking. John asks her why she married Carlos.

 

Gabrielle: "Well, he promised to give me everything I've ever wanted."
John: "And did he?"
Gabrielle: "Yes."
John: "So why aren't you happy?"
Gabrielle: "I wanted all the wrong things."
John: "So do you love him?"
Gabrielle: "Yes."
John: "Then why are we here? Why are we doing this?"
Gabrielle: "Because I don't want to wake up one morning with a sudden urge to blow my brains out."
John: "Hmm. Hey, can I have a drag?"
Gabrielle: "Absolutely not. You're much too young to smoke."

They kiss.

 

---

That night, Susan fluffs her hair and checks her outfit while looking in a mirror. She asks Julie "How would you feel about me using your child support payments for plastic surgery?"

Julie, working at the dinner table on a school project with popsicle sticks, tells her mom that she looks fine. Susan tells her "If you would cut back to two meals per day, I could get the chemical peel."

Julie tells her not to be nervous, she's just asking him out to dinner.

Susan stops primping and goes over to where her daughter's working.

 

Susan: "So, is that your project for school? You know, when I was in fifth grade, I made the White House out of sugar cubes."
Julie: "Stop stalling and go. Before Mike figures out he can do better."
Susan: "Tell me again why I fought for custody for you."
Julie: "You were using me to hurt dad."
Susan: "Oh, that's right."

She kisses the top of Julie's head and walks out, groaning.

 

---

At Mike's house, she knocks on his door. He answers, wearing jeans and a tight T-shirt, holding a beer.

 

Susan: "Are you busy?"
Mike: "No, not at all. What's up?"
Susan: "Well, I just, uh, was wondering, if there was any chance that you, uh, I was just wanting to ask if -"

Suddenly, Edie comes to the door.

 

Susan: "Edie!"
Edie: "Hey, there, Susan."
Susan: "What are you -"
Edie: "I was making ambrosia. And I made too much, so I thought I'd bring some over to Mike. What's going on?"
Mike: "Susan was just going to ask me something."

He raises his eyebrows at her.

 

Susan: "I have a clog."
Mike: "Excuse me?"
Susan: "And you're a plumber, right?"
Mike: "Yeah."
Susan: "The clog's in the pipe."
Mike: "Yeah, That's usually where they are."
Susan: "Well, I've got one."
Mike: "Well, let me go get my tools."
Susan: "Now? You want to come over now? You have company."
Edie: "I don't mind."

She smirks at Susan.

Mike tells Susan "Just give me two minutes. I'll be right over." He walks back into the house and Edie closes the door in Susan's face. Susan turns and runs back to her house.

 

---

Susan and Julie frantically stuff hair into the drain. Julie says it's not enough to clog the drain. Susan grabs some peanut butter and cooking oil to pour down the drain. "And these olives." Julie says that it's not working.

The doorbell rings, and through the kitchen window, Susan can see Mike, who smiles at her.

Susan asks "How am I going to stop up this sink?" She turns to Julie, who turns to face her, and together they turn to look at Julie's popsicle project sitting on the kitchen table.

 

---

Later, Mike is on his back in the kitchen, fixing the pipe, with Susan watching him.

 

Mike: "Well, here's your problem. Looks like somebody stuffed a bunch of popsicle sticks down here."
Susan: "I've told Julie a million times not to play in the kitchen. Kids, you know?"She catches sight of her daughter on the stairs, who glares at her. When Mike turns his attention back to the pipes, she shrugs her shoulders and looks apologetically at Julie.

 

---

At a family restaurant, Bree and her family get their order taken. Andrew says that the restaurant has video games. He asks if they can play until their food gets there. Bree tells him that it's family time. Rex interrupts her and tells them that they can play. The kids leave.

 

Bree: "I know you think that I'm angry about coming here, but I'm not. You and the kids wanted a change of pace and some fun. I get it."
Rex: "I want a divorce. I just can't live in this, this detergent commercial anymore."

She stares at him, shocked.

The waiter comes over and tells them that the salad bar is over there and they can help themselves. Bree composes herself and takes Rex's salad plate. She tells him that she'll get his salad. As she gets up, he asks her, "Bree, did you hear me?" She goes to the salad bar, and begins putting salad and toppings on the plate automatically.

Mrs. Huber comes up to her. "Bree Van De Kamp!" Bree turns to face her. "Oh! Hello, Mrs. Huber." Mrs. Huber says that they didn't get a chance to talk at the wake. How is Bree doing?

Bree stares blankly into the salad bar as she adds more toppings.

"Bree longed to share the truth of her husband's painful betrayal, but sadly for Bree, admitting defeat was not an option."

Bree turns back to Mrs. Huber. "Everything is great. Just great."

She arrives back at the table. "I got you the honey mustard dressing. The ranch looked just a little bit suspect." Resigned, he begins eating. She watches him as he chews.

 

Rex: "Bree, are we gonna talk about what I said?"
Bree: "If you think that I'm gonna discuss the dissolution of my marriage in a place where the restrooms are labeled Chicks and Dudes, you're out of your mind."

Suddenly, Rex clutches at his throat. "What's in this?" She tells him that it's salad. He asks her "With onions?" For a minute, she doesn't say anything, but just stares at him. He starts to get up from the booth.

 

Rex: "You put onions in my salad!"
Bree: "No, I didn't!"

He falls to the ground, knocking the table cloth with the plates on it over. Bree suddenly remembers. "Oh, wait!"

 

---

Late at night, at the Young house

Zachary Young, who was sleeping in his bed, suddenly sits up straight. He can hear a noise and he gets out of bed to look out his window. He goes outside and walks towards the sound.

He reaches the pool, where the water had been drained out of it. Paul Young is using a rock pick to cut through the dirt and rock at the bottom.

"It was the sound of a family secret."

Paul looks up and sees Zachary, then goes back to work.





 

---

Lynette is feeding her baby, who flings food at her.

A twin runs in, shouting that their dad is home. They climb all over him as he walks in. Lynette gets up, happy to see him. She says that she wasn't expecting to see him. He says that he has to go back in the morning, but that she sounded "a little frazzled" so he came home.

The kids ask him for presents, and he gives them a football. He makes them promise that they will go outside and practice throwing for 20 minutes. They promise and then run out. He throws the football to them.

As they play, Tom and Lynette go into the bedroom, kissing. Lynette protests, saying that she's exhausted, looks terrible, and she's covered in peaches. He tells her that he's gotta have her. He starts fumbling with his pants.

She lies back on the pillows, tired.

 

Lynette: "Well, is it okay if I just lie here?"
Tom: "Absolutely."

He takes off his jacket. They kiss.

She tells him that she was having trouble with swelling, so the doctor took her off of the pill, and he needs to use a condom.

 

Tom: "Condom? What's the big deal? Let's risk it."
Lynette: "Let's risk it?"
Tom: "Yeah."

She punches him, and he falls off of her to the side.

 

---

In the hospital, Rex is in a hospital bed with Bree sitting by his bedside.

 

Rex: "I can't believe you tried to kill me."
Bree: "Yes, well, I feel badly about that. I told you, Mrs. Huber came over, and I got distracted. It was a mistake."
Rex: "Since when do you make mistakes?"
Bree: "What's that supposed to mean?"
Rex: "It means that I'm sick of you being so damn perfect all the time. You're this plastic suburban housewife..."

Bree looks stunned as he talks.

 

Rex: "...with her pearls and her spatula who says things like "We owe the Hendersons a dinner." Where's the woman I fell in love with? Who used to burn the toast and drink milk out of the carton? And laugh. I need her. Not this cold perfect thing you've become."

Bree gets up and takes a vase of flowers into the bathroom, explaining that they need water.



In the bathroom, she quickly adjusts the flowers and then turns on the faucet. Then she begins to cry..

 

---

Carlos kneels down to look at the grass on the lawn as Gabrielle rushes out of the house in an evening gown. He asks her if John was there today. She says yes. He says that the lawn hadn't been mowed, and he's had it with John; he's gonna get a real gardener. She asks him why.

 

Carlos: "Are you deaf? I just said he's not doing his job."
Gabrielle: "It's dark. You just can't see that the lawn has been mowed."
Carlos: "It hasn't been. Feel this grass."
Gabrielle: "I'm not feeling the grass. Let's just get going."

She walks off and Carlos looks at the grass again.

At the party, they walk into the group of people mingling outside. He sees Tanaka, and tells her that it's "time for me to go into my dance." She wishes him luck and kisses him. He walks off.

She frantically looks around. She grabs a waiter and points out Carlos. She tells the waiter to make sure that he has a drink in his hand all night long. She takes some money and gives it to the waiter. The waiter smiles and goes off to follow Carlos.



Gabrielle rushes off and drives back home. She reaches her house, gets out of the car, and pulls out the lawn mower, still in her evening gown. She starts the mower and begins mowing the lawn.

Later, once she's finished, she returns to the party and looks for Carlos. He's where she left him, still with Tanaka, and the waiter is handing him a drink. She breathes a sigh of relief and rubs a hand through her hair, where she finds a leaf behind her ear. Gasping, she pulls it out and drops it to the ground, looking around to make sure nobody noticed.

 

---

The next morning, at Carlos and Gabrielle's house, Carlos walks outside. He walks through the lawn, then stops, looks down, and kneels, feeling the grass. Shaking his head, he gets back up and walks to his car.



Gabrielle is up on the balcony and she breathes a sigh of relief as she watches him.

 

---

At the grocery store, Susan is shopping. She gets stopped by Mrs. Huber, who says that she's not feeling well, that her stomach is upset.

 

Mrs. Huber: "I had the worst macaroni and cheese at the wake. It's been running through me ever since. And I need to be at my best. Edie Britt's son is spending the night tonight."
Susan: "He's spending the night?"
Mrs. Huber: "Apparently, Edie is having a gentleman friend over for dinner and I think she plans on entertaining into the wee hours. If you know what I mean."



She turns back to the medicines as Susan rushes off, without her cart. Mrs. Huber doesn't notice as she continues talking to Susan. "Oh, here's some antacid. Have you ever tried this?" She looks up and Susan is gone.

 

---

Susan is pacing in her kitchen.

 

Susan: "I can't believe it. This can't be happening. Mike can't like Edie better than me, He just can't!"
Julie: "You don't know what's going on. Maybe they're just having dinner."

Susan just stares at her.

Julie continues. "You're right. They're doing it."

 

"Bree sobbed quietly in the restroom for five minutes. But her husband never knew. Because when Bree finally emerged, she was perfect."

 

"Seven days after my funeral, life at Wisteria Lane finally returned to normal. Which, for some of my friends, was unfortunate."

 

"The sound that awakened my son was something he'd heard only once before, many years ago, when he was quite young. But he recognized it instantly."

 

---

Susan walks to Edie's house, a measuring cup in her hand. She sees a car parked in front, and she goes up to the house and knocks on the door. She calls out Edie's name, then goes around the back of the house. "Edie?" She tries a door and it's unlocked, so she calls out softly, "Hello? Anyone home?" She goes inside, calling out, "Edie? are you here? I need to borrow sugar."

She walks into the living room, where clothing is thrown haphazardly on the floor. Candles are lit, and music is playing. Susan picks up Edie's bra, which is lying on the couch, and hears sounds of lovemaking from upstairs.

Susan sits on the couch, the measuring cup dropping, forgotten, onto the floor.

"And despite the precariousness of her situation..."

Susan dejected, throws Edie's bra behind her, where it hits a candle, knocking it against the curtains.

"...Susan took a moment to mourn her loss."

Susan takes a chocolate from an open container on the coffee table and eats it. Behind her, the curtains burst into flames.

After a minute, she smells the flames, and turns around, confused.

When she sees the flames, she jumps up and tries waving her arms at it, but the fire is too big. She runs to the coffee table, grabs some glasses of wine, and throws them onto the fire. The fire just roars bigger. Holding the wine glasses, she takes a pair of jeans and tries snuffing it out with them, but instead, the jeans catch on fire.

She throws the burning jeans onto the coffee table, where the items on the table begin burning. Susan doesn't know what to do and just stands there, shocked.

Edie calls down, "Is someone down there?"

Her smoke detector goes off, and Susan runs off, leaving behind the measuring cup on the floor.

Edie shouts, "My God, that's smoke!"

Susan makes it outside and runs across the lawn to escape.

 

---

The firefighters spray water on the house, which is completely engulfed in flames.

Edie rushes around the ambulance, sees her house, and is devastated.

Mrs. Huber, off camera, begins talking to a neighbor. "It's her own fault. I've got no sympathy for her. Apparently, she left some candles unattended in the den. The paramedics said she was lucky. She could have been killed."

Susan walks up to Gabrielle, Lynette, and Bree, who are standing behind police tape, watching the fire. Lynette tells Gabrielle that Edie had been having sex with some guy when the fire started. Gabrielle asks what happened to the guy. Lynette tells her: "He got smoke inhalation. He's at the hospital."

Susan is visibly upset. Bree asks if she's all right. Susan says that she feels really bad for Edie. Gabrielle says that she shouldn't feel bad for Edie.

 

Gabrielle: "She's a strong lady."
Lynette: "Absolutely. She'll get through this. She'll find a way to survive."
Bree: "We all do."

She turns and leaves, and the rest, minus Susan, follow. Susan walks to a police car and leans against it, looking at the fire.

A man walks up to her. It's Mike, who asks Susan "Wow. What happened?" Susan, seeing Mike, is thrilled. "Mike!"

"And suddenly, there he was, like a phoenix rising from the ashes."

 

Susan: "I thought you were - Uh, where were you?"
Mike: "I just got back from the movies. So, Edie had a fire, huh?"
Susan looks much happier: "Yeah. Yeah, but she's fine now. Everything's fine now."

Susan and Mike watch the fire together.

 

---

With the fire still blazing in the background, Mike heads home.

Mike picks up the phone and dials a number. "Hey, it's me. No, I have nothing yet. But don't worry. I'm definitely getting closer."

He reaches into his jeans, pulls out a gun, and places it next to the phone.

 

---

The next day, at the Young's house, the four women finish cleaning out Mary Alice's items.

Susan brings out some champagne, for a toast.

Susan makes a toast. "All right, ladies, lift 'em up. To Mary Alice. Good friend and neighbor. Wherever you are, we hope you've found peace."

They all say her name, clink glasses, and drink.

Lynette tells them they should get on the road. Gabrielle reaches into a box with Mary Alice's clothing, asking them if they've seen it. She pulls out some clothing, and an envelope falls out of the box onto the sidewalk. She tells the other woman that Mary Alice always told her she was a size 6, when her clothing is instead a size 8. She laughs. "Guess we found the skeleton in her closet."

Bree sees the letter on the ground and picks it up. Gabrielle asks her what it is. "It's a letter addressed to Mary Alice."

Gabrielle takes it from her.

Gabrielle opens the envelope. Lynette asks her what she's doing. Gabrielle says that it was open. "What's the big deal?" They all shrug, and Gabrielle opens the letter that was inside. She and Lynette read it, then pass it to Susan and Bree.

The letter reads: "I know what you did. It makes me sick. I'm going to tell."

 

Susan: "What does this mean?"
Lynette: "I don't know, but check out the postmark."
Bree: "Oh my god, she got it the day she died."
Gabrielle: "Do you think this is why she..."

 

Susan: "Oh, Mary Alice, what did you do?"



They stand there, looking at each other solemnly.

 

~ The End ~

 

"I am so sorry girls. I never wanted you to be burdened with this."

 

"How ironic. To have something I tried so desperately to keep secret treated so casually."

 

"Not quite, Gabrielle. Not quite."

 

"The next day, my friends came together to pack away my clothes, my personal belongings, and what was left of my life."

 

"Not to mention, a few unexpected surprises."

 

"And just like that, Susan was happy. Life was suddenly full of possibilities."

 

"It didn't take Susan long to realize this was not her night."

 

"And just like that, the possibility Susan had clung to, the maybe of Mike Delfino was gone forever."

 

"...women don't fight fair."

Season One

Teri Hatcher - "Susan Mayer"
Felicity Huffman - "Lynette Scavo"
Marcia Cross - "Bree Van De Kamp"
Eva Longoria - "Gabrielle Solis"
Nicollette Sheridan - "Edie Britt"
Steven Culp - "Rex Van De Kamp"
Ricardo Antonio Chavira - "Carlos Solis"
Mark Moses - "Paul Young"
Andrea Bowen - "Julie Mayer"
Jesse Metcalfe - "John Rowland"
Cody Kasch - "Zach Young"
Brenda Strong - "Mary Alice Young"
James Denton - "Mike Delfino"

Season Two

Teri Hatcher - "Susan Mayer"
Felicity Huffman - "Lynette Scavo"
Marcia Cross - "Bree Van De Kamp"
Eva Longoria - "Gabrielle Solis"
Nicollette Sheridan - "Edie Britt"
Alfre Woodard - "Betty Applewhite"
Ricardo Antonio Chavira - "Carlos Solis"
Mark Moses - "Paul Young"
Andrea Bowen - "Julie Mayer"
Doug Savant - "Tom Scavo"
Cody Kasch - "Zach Young"
Richard Burgi - "Karl Mayer"
Brenda Strong - "Mary Alice Young"
James Denton - "Mike Delfino"

Season Three

Teri Hatcher - "Susan Mayer"
Felicity Huffman - "Lynette Scavo"
Marcia Cross - "Bree Van De Kamp"
Eva Longoria - "Gabrielle Solis"
Nicollette Sheridan - "Edie Britt"
Ricardo Antonio Chavira - "Carlos Solis"
Andrea Bowen - "Julie Mayer"
Doug Savant - "Tom Scavo"
Kyle MacLachlan - "Orson Hodge"
Brenda Strong - "Mary Alice Young"
James Denton - "Mike Delfino"

Created by Michael Wang

烈日当头
三十五六
雨中长亭亦可纳凉 

网途劳顿
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十里长亭可作歇脚

烈日酷暑
狂风暴雨 
在长亭
防晒避雨
放眼望去
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